Five reasons why Tellmi users are safe from grooming

Anonymity and pre-moderation protect Tellmi’s users from becoming victims of grooming, ensuring it is a safe digital space for children and young people to seek mental health support.  Here are five ways Tellmi keeps our users safe.

1. Unsafe digital platforms are exposing an increasing number of lonely young people to online exploitation and grooming. We know that young people use online spaces to help themselves to feel less lonely. In any context, sharing reciprocal support can create healthy social bonds, but research shows that unsafe digital platforms are exposing an increasing number of lonely young people to online exploitation and grooming; 40% of young people in the UK have been approached by someone who they thought was attempting to befriend them but ultimately attempted to manipulate them (Childline, n.d.).  
   
   This couldn’t happen on Tellmi.  Our 100% pre-moderation policy means that every single post and reply is checked by a human before it is published and trained Tellmi SuperPeer® volunteers ensure that every post receives a good reply and no one is ever left out.
   

2. Online grooming is an increasing problem.  NSPCC (2023) data has identified an 82% increase in the number of online grooming offences that were dealt with by the police between 2017/18 and 2022/23 in the UK, with lonely children twice as likely to be groomed (NSPCC, 2020). Vulnerable and lonely young people who are desperate for peer acceptance can find it hard to identify when they are being groomed and it is significantly easier to exploit young people who lack emotional intelligence or digital literacy (Internet Matters, n.d.). 
   
   This couldn’t happen on Tellmi.   Tellmi is a safe place where young people can talk anonymously about anything that is worrying them, but behind the scenes, our moderators and counsellors risk assess every interaction and qualified counsellors respond privately if they have any concerns about a young person’s wellbeing. Resources in our in-app Directory ensure that Tellmi users understand how to stay safe online and avoid groomers.
   

3. Groomers create connections in one digital platform and move their victim to another. A common tactic used by groomers is to build initial trust with a young person in an anonymous online space before encouraging them to continue their conversation in a closed space, such as private or encrypted messaging services (NSPCC, 2020; Turner, 2019). It is the modern equivalent of someone offering a child sweets to get into a car, with groomers luring the child away from a public space and into one where they can control them and where others are less likely to see or watch (Turner, 2019). 
   
   This couldn’t happen on Tellmi. Although Tellmi supports some of the most vulnerable young people in the UK, pre-moderation means that no personal information can ever be exchanged, so even if they tried, groomers couldn’t share enough information to allow them to arrange to meet a Tellmi user in a different online space. 
   

4. Misperceptions about the age of groomers confuses young people. Although online groomers are almost always perceived to be adults, the average age of online child groomers is just 25 and peer-to-peer grooming is a common occurrence (Eser, 2024); 9% of young people in the UK have experienced peer-to-peer online grooming. This figure increases to 20% for young people who are lonely, unhappy, extroverted and heavily reliant on social media. In contrast, 4% of young people have been groomed by an adult rising to 9% for children who are unhappy and socially isolated (NSPCC, 2020). 
   
   This couldn’t happen on Tellmi.  Tellmi is age-banded so that young people are only ever talking to people who are within two years of their own age. People can always fake their age but pre-moderation means that all conversations are monitored by humans in real time, and anything that is deemed to be unhelpful or suspicious is withheld.
   

5. Grooming proliferates because young people are afraid to report it. In a report by Childnet (2020), 55% of respondents said they wouldn’t report being groomed online because they feared getting in trouble, while 62% of respondents felt they would be partly to blame. 
   
   This couldn’t happen on Tellmi.  Because Tellmi is anonymous, it is one of the few safe digital spaces where young people can speak openly and so, inevitably, we support many young people who have been groomed or are worried that they are being groomed. With psychological support from the Tellmi community and Tellmi counsellors and psychoeducation through Tellmi Directory resources, young people who have been groomed build the confidence to protect themselves and report grooming offences. 

Read about Tellmi’s commitment to safeguarding and our moderation guidelines.

To learn more about commissioning Tellmi in your area please get in touch. 

References 

Childnet (2020). Peer-on-peer online sexual harassment: Understanding, responding and support. https://www.childnet.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/Guidance_for_Police_-_Peer_on_peer_online_sexual_harassment.pdf 

Eser, A. (2024) Child Grooming Statistics: 1 in 5 Children Targeted Online. World Metrics. https://worldmetrics.org/child-grooming-statistics/  

Internet matters (n.d.) Learn about online grooming. https://www.internetmatters.org/issues/online-grooming/learn-about-it/#:~:text=Grooming%20is%20when%20someone%20seeks,discuss%20the%20risks%20with%20them. 

NSPCC (2020). Lonely children are twice as likely to be groomed online. https://www.nspcc.org.uk/about-us/news-opinion/2020/coronavirus-children-groomed-online/ 

NSPCC (2023). 82% rise in online grooming crimes against children in the last 5 years. https://www.nspcc.org.uk/about-us/news-opinion/2023/2023-08-14-82-rise-in-online-grooming-crimes-against-children-in-the-last-5-years/  

Turner, A. (2019). Online Grooming: The Practice of ‘Moving Children’ Online. Cybersafe Scotland. https://www.cybersafescotland.org/post/the-practice-of-moving-children-online 

Wood, A. C., & Wheatcroft, J. M. (2020). Young Adult Perceptions of Internet Communications and the Grooming Concept. Sage Open, 10(1). https://doi.org/10.1177/2158244020914573  https://doi.org/10.1177/2158244020914573